WISDOM WEDNESDAYS

       Belligerent Coaches
              
       Ideally, coaches are supposed to help you grow as a writer.
       And they do for the most part, especially if your coach is kind
       with her remarks and her attitude towards you is positive. But
       what if it isn’t?
      
       The first thing that it is important to realize is that when our
       coach criticizes us, she is not personally criticizing us but our
       work. Yes, I know that our work is an extension of us, and that we
       become very intimately involved with our work. But we are NOT
       our writing. We are merely associated with our writing.
      
       The second thing we must realize is that when our coaches are
       belligerent, this has very little with us and much more to do with
       who they are as people. Belligerent coaches are belligerent people,
       and such people exist whether or not we run into them as coaches,
       doctors, or spouses. So, we have to know that this has NOTHING
       TO DO WITH WHAT WE DO OR DON’T DO. THEY JUST ARE
       WHO THEY ARE.
      
       The third thing that we should realize about belligerent coaches
       is some coaches believe that they must be tough in order to show
       you the tricks of the trade. But is this really the case? Can’t kind
       tips and tricks also work?
      
       I can certainly attest to the fact that they do work because I have
       been a teacher for over twenty years myself. And I NEVER PUT
       MY STUDENTS DOWN. I always help them. I am always positive.
       And, yes, they grow as a result of it.
      
       So, tough instruction isn’t necessary. Just kind, persistent
       instruction presented constructively rather than destructively. So,
       which would you rather be? A kind teacher/coach or a belligerent
       one? You may have less of a choice about this than you think you
       have.
      
       ~ Irene

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